When I first started this blog, I never actually thought it would catch anyone’s attention. I figured that my readers would likely be limited to the few friends asking me for advice to begin with. It is clear to me now, that is not the case. People are actually reading.. and noticing.. and enjoying… and that makes me extremely happy. My blog is still technically a baby. It’s roughly only 9 months old. If it really were a baby, it would be trotting around the floor on all fours.. perhaps even still doing the notorious army crawl. However, it is not a real baby.. it’s a blog.. and it has decided to fly by the seat of its pants and earn itself an invitation to the Disney Social Media Moms Celebration “On-the-Road” – Quite possibly my first real “squeeeee” moment as a blogger. I was so thrilled.. excited.. honored.. to be invited to this event. I decided to use the chance to meet up with some fabulous other mama’s that I’ve come to know via the internet and have some fun. (Like FaVe Mom) It is going to be so exciting!! We plotted which hotel to stay at. More excitement. I got my confirmation email. Still excited. Booked my flight. Wait.. this is real. Insert panic.
Why panic, you ask? You see.. in my almost 8 years of motherhood, I can count the number of times I have been without my children for any reason, on one hand. My youngest? Well, the longest I’ve ever left him (and only with his dad!) was 3 hours. He’s a bit of a mama’s boy. (Okay, I’m lying.. he’s extremely a mama’s boy!) I am about to board a plane.. fly a state away.. and be gone for a good 38 hours. I know, I know. It doesn’t seem like much.. but in my mind it’s an eternity.
I keep going over all these dramatic scenarios in my head. Will my husband really be able to handle our THREE children, by himself, for TWO DAYS? Will he manage to balance bed time for all three boys without sending someone into a crying fit that lasts until I come home the following night? What if he decides to venture out? I know this is all ridiculous. My husband is a fabulous father and my children will be in very capable hands. Will I be okay, though?
I think I rely on my daily moments with my kids more than they rely on them. Watching my toddler drift off to sleep. Listening to my oldest do his daily reading.. listening to the giggling coming from our play room. Can I really go two whole days without those little moments? What if I miss something? What if they need me? What if something happens and I’m not there?
Deep down, I know that this will all be fine. Deep down I know that the opportunity that has been placed before me is so fabulous and I get a chance to go somewhere I have never been before (San Francisco!) but the mama in me can’t help but be sad. Nervous. A little scared, even. And when I come home, I will look back on this post and laugh while eating my Ghiradelli chocolate.
How old were your kids when you left them overnight for the first time? Were you scared? Nervous? Ecstatic?