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Babies Baby Gear Baby Wearing Kids Pregnancy Shopping Yah Yah Photography

So you want a big family… (or not)

I had a very fun opportunity this past week. I recorded a segment for a podcast!

This all came about a couple weeks ago. I noticed I had been tagged a couple times in a post in the gDiapers Facebook community. I clicked to see what I was being called out for, and I instantly laughed upon seeing the post. They were looking for parents of large families (5+ children) to interview for their podcast.

After laughing, I sat and thought for a minute. I’m really the person my friends think of when asked if they know any crazy people who can’t seem to stop having babies?!? Yep. I am. *insert more laughing*

The focus was a lot about how you know when and if you’re done having babies. There were a lot of questions regarding this.. but one actually made me think. What would I say or what advice would I give to someone trying to decide if they’re done.

Considering only ONE of our SIX babies were planned, and one was a birth control baby when we thought we were finished, I have no advice to give on deciding whether you’re done or not. We have been blessed beyond measure – but with very little deciding. (Until now, that is..) That said — I do have a lot of insight on having a large family. So, if you’re sitting there, staring at your all-too-quickly growing baby, trying to decide if you want to set out to procreate like rabbits.. here’s a few things to think about:

•On your worst day, how do you handle the chaos? Large families come with a lot of chaos, even on the good days. You often find yourself running in circles. Like you’re in one of those revolving doors and can’t seems to figure out how to get out of it. Round and round you go. Same stuff, different kid. Over and over until you hit the mattress. (And then a couple times after you’ve hit the mattress. Kids, they just KNOW when you’ve attempted to relax!)

•Do you enjoy shopping at Costco? Costco is one of those things that is no longer a luxury. A trip to Costco used to be one of those “Oh! I can buy our entire months worth of groceries!” Nope. It’s basically a necessity just for a week’s worth of feeding 6 kids. Especially when almost all of them are growing boys with giant appetites. (Have you seen how much a preteen boy can put down?!? And WHERE does it go?????)

•Are you willing to size up your vehicle? Our particular dilemma when we found out that number 6 was on the way was that we would require 5 car seats or boosters to be installed. My gripe is that most large vehicles don’t feel the need to accommodate car seats like they should. We upgraded to a full size van just to fit the amount and types of seats we needed to install, plus give room for all the STUFF that going out with 6 kids requires. It also allows us to not fold our giant stroller (Uppababy Vista) so, yay for being lazy! I mean, uhhh, saving time!

•Are you one of those people who loves doing laundry?  Here’s an equation for you. Smelly, sweaty preteen + sticky, snot nosed toddler + slobbery, poop filled infant = A LOT OF LAUNDRY. Along with upgrading the vehicle, you may need to upgrade your washer and dryer capacity. I used to love laundry. I no longer love laundry.

•Cold and flu season.. when one goes down… the entire forest is going down with them. I’ll never forget when I was about 7 months pregnant.. our toddler vomited as we were getting him ready for bed. We thought it was a one off, as he seemed fine after. Put him down to bed and moved on. An hour later, our 3 year old followed suit. Oh no. Okay.. two was tolerable. By 3 am, we had 5 vomiting children and a pile of towels and sheets covering beds and the floor. (Which goes back up to “do you like laundry?” Ha!)

•Are you willing to become best friends with your local baristas? Let’s face it – coffee is my life line. Drink the coffee, do the things. Fairly certain my baristas know what kind of day I’m having based on how many times I roll my giant van through the drive-thru (also a necessity!) and how many children are crying as I do so. They know my drink based on time of day. No joke.

In all seriousness, though..

Do you want a lot of kids? This is probably the only thing that matters. Everything else works itself out. If you want a large family, if you love being a parent and want to keep doing it.. do it! We have our people, our tribes or our villages, whatever you want to call them.. and that’s great. They will all have an opinion on whether you should or shouldn’t have several kids. They’ll probably voice those opinions, too. But as nice as it is to have a support team, this decision is one only you can make, and you shouldn’t let anyone make you feel otherwise.

We love our big family, and our children love our big family. Did we set out thinking we’d have 6 kids? No. It’s been amazing, though. We did make the decision to be done-done (or as done as you can be.. they say nothing is 100%) after baby girl.. We thought we were done after number 5, and she is the whipped cream that topped off our mocha.. We felt ready to make that decision of completion.

Half a dozen kids, one kid, no kids. We all have our ideas of what OUR perfect family is. None of us are right or wrong. Make the decision that works for your family. Also, keep an open mind. Sometimes surprises or tragedies happen and our ideas get changed a bit. Embrace your family, and never apologize for your decisions.

Categories
Announcements Babies Pregnancy Yah Yah Photography

Our Combined Pregnancy and Gender Announcement

When we found out we were pregnant with baby number 6, there was one thing my husband and I were sure of. We were going to wait to announce our pregnancy until after we knew the gender of our baby. Quite honestly, I didn’t want to hear what people thought I must need/want/be having.

Waiting 16-20 weeks to announce a pregnancy is not always easy. Especially when it’s number 6. You tend to be showing much earlier and if children notice — children talk. This meant we also had to keep it a secret from our kids. There were a few “mom, you’re belly is kind of getting a little big..” from our very blunt 5 year old.. but overall my boys were oblivious.

The day came. As I sat in my OBGYN’s office 16 weeks pregnant, he wheeled in the ultrasound machine and declared “we’re going to look..” and look he did. Very closely. As the words came out of his mouth, there was a pause. I honestly was waiting for “and there’s another boy!” — but that is not what he said. “You know, It’s not what I am seeing, but rather what I’m not seeing.. ” Then, we stared intently for more than 10 minutes. Poking, prodding, getting images of every angle baby would cooperate for. We knew his verdict wasn’t 100%, but because hiding it was getting increasingly difficult as each week came, we decided that his “95% positive” was assuring enough to do our announcement. We could always amend our photos later if our 20 week anatomy ultrasound happened to show something otherwise. Haha.

We messaged back and forth with our family photographer, Olivia of Yah Yah Photography here in Portland, Oregon. She has been photographing our family for over 10 years and her excitement over this uncharted territory was equal to ours. Together we knew we needed to do this big and obvious. The photo shoot would not only be telling the world we were pregnant AND having a girl — but the shoot itself would tell our boys they were going to have a baby sister. Something they have begged for. She invisioned a lot of pink – and together our Pink Tea Party “Baby Sister Boot Camp” came to fruition.

We were a little worried our boys would figure it all out before we captured it.. but lucky for us, our kids don’t think twice about the color pink or the random things we do for photo shoots. As the pink treats and balloons came out, they just assumed it was for Spring. Olivia set up the tea party at a park and then she waiting as we all walked over to join her. It was the perfect way to get the little details captured before making the announcement obvious. She then proceeded with a seemingly normal photo shoot at first.

We then walked our boys over to the table, where they began to get confused by the tiaras on the table – but brushed it off fairly quickly. I mean, there were cookies, cupcakes and jellybeans to be had.

After a moment, Olivia declared that she had forgotten something in her car and needed Dad to go retrieve it. He came walking back with “It’s a Girl” balloons and two chalkboard signs. One said “Baby Sister Boot Camp” and one was adorned with baby sister’s name. That’s when it hit them — and we captured their reactions both on video and in these amazing photos.

The hardest part was the week after we did this photo shoot, having to keep our children away from anyone they may spill the beans to. Hahaha. Proud to say, we managed that nicely and it was a very successful surprise for everyone.

By the way — We have since had 2 more ultrasounds, with a total of 5 people in all telling us she is, indeed, a girl. I guess I’ll believe it. Hahaha.

How and when did you announce your pregnancy and/or the gender of your baby?

Categories
Kids Tech

Kids and Social Media – The quest for Internet approval

This post seems so odd for me, a blogger, to write. After all, my “reach” is the measurement of my success, right? Companies email and ask for my stats. How many people read my posts? How many followers do I have on Instagram? I have to work, and work hard, in order to get people to “like” me in order to stay relevant. Every post I make, I hope surpasses the last. How many people saw that? Did it garner enough “likes”? Is my engagement on Instagram strong enough? How can I increase my engagement?

This all seemed normal to me in this “industry” — the cutthroat world of bloggers.. where one day we can be the bees knees and the next day, we’re yesterday’s laundry. I should say, it all seemed normal to me until my children downloaded, after an absurd amount of begging, the LEGO Life app.

It was presented to me as a harmless, safe, and age appropriate social media site for kids *under 13* who love LEGO. A way to share their passion for all things LEGO. Okay. Sounds good! I love me some social media.. I see nothing wrong with it.

Then it started. “HEY!! My picture got 5 likes! I can’t believe it!” I paused. My husband and I both looked at each other and he made a comment about how the “search for likes” was already beginning. I laughed, because I didn’t actually think about it. After all, that is my normal. Then came the conversations back and forth.. “Someone commented on my picture!! So cool! Has anyone commented on your pictures?” Oh. Okay. Now it’s a contest between them? I don’t know how much I’m liking this. However, I’m not a hypocrite. Let’s see how this goes.

Fast forward a week or so.. “I got 28 likes! That’s a first! That’s so crazy that 28 people like my picture! I wonder if I can get more!”

That’s when this all hit me. Is this really an acceptable “normal”? Am *I* teaching them this behavior? Are they hearing me make comments that I hadn’t even thought about having an impact? Why is an 8 year old worried about the reach their picture of a LEGO is getting from other 8 year olds?

Is this behavior actually okay? Am I over thinking it? Right now, it’s relatively harmless.. just a crowd of under-13 aged kids sharing with other under-13 aged kids, giving them likes and emoji filled comments. Right? Or is this a slippery slope in the world of social media I know all too well. The parts of blogging that even I cringe at. Where community suddenly becomes competition.

How many of your kids are using LEGO Life? What are your feelings? I’m especially curious about my fellow blogger friends.